what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking