Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
