so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Randomize
