Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
