so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
