i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
