I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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