No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Randomize
