I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
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Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
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When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.