Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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