It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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