She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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