quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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