god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You've changed since you got that strap on
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize
