I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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