whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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