I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
