Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
