I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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