OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
