oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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