Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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