I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
