If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
babies were throwing up all over the place
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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