so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize