So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
