I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
