Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
