out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
