He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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