omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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