Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So many bounce houses so little time
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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