he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
