Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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