cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
