I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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