she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize