So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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