Dual....:-)
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
