belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize
