Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
