I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize