I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
