Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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