Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Randomize