i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
