do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
