Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
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