Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
