There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize